Ello yer lot!
Well, I will take yer salary, but only if it's more than what the town criers give me when I ask them for a donation. Bloody tight bunch they are them towns people ...
Anyhow, I will write yer something for yer posh stratum papers, but it will take me a few days since I still have my appointments with them ogre lords and them fancy meer people. And my writing is not very fast at the moment, as I always have this pain in my left knee and it buggers me. Mary used to have this smelly old creme to put on for her bad skin, and it seemed to help with my knee as well. But as she is still gone to see her cousin in gargoyle land, I have to take things slower than I used to do.
So, if yer want my help, that's how it will be.
Yers bardic
Scrumpy Jack