Well, I did say, if I ever let any of ye down, let me know, and I will try to put things to rights, so let me start with those who use a more classical style of scroll.
Apologies to those who did not want to suffer through my speeches more than once!
*shuffles forward to podium, clears throat*
Ladies and Gentlemen, Orcs, Elves and Gargoyles!
Lend me your ears!
*flinches under barage of severed ears*
Minocans! Friends! Fellow miners!
Today, we advance the grand tale of Minoc!
You have shown the mining spirit that triumphs over trolls and ore elementals!
The same spirit which has caused this town to rise from the fathomless depths of our earliest mine to the great heights of hope that we find here today!
For, while each of us will stake our own claim, and mine our own ore, we are a Minocan family, and we prospect and prosper as one town and one people!
*hands out free Minocan ale, hears cheering*
While this beloved ground beneath us has at times been hard, while the path the ore cart travels has been long, we have steadfastly dug our way here, and we know in our hearts that there is gold in these here hills! Nay, better - there is platinum!
So, the outcome of this vote is not a victory for me.
This is a victory for Minoc!
I am not here to be waited on, to loot the town treasury, and decorate my mine with gleaming pit supports! Nay, good citizens!
Note this, and note it well: I am here to serve.
You have made me your governor, and I do not take that trust lightly.
I thank you for the confidence you have shown in me, and I in turn trust you to hold me to account.
If I please you, I do not need or seek praise.
But, if I disappoint you, I count on you to let me know immediately, that we might find a resolution!
Now, to matters of governance.
First, I hereby abolish the previous governor's requirement that all miners take weekly baths! Tis a disgusting habit, and wastes perfectly good sluice water!
*hears loud cheering, and a few groans from the wives of miners*
"He who shouts loudest" will not be the way of things here.
(Apologies to Shouty Bob and Loudmouth Fred, my staunch supporters).
You will be given ample opportunity to present your views and needs, and I will weigh them up, and act accordingly!
Do not attempt to bribe me - I am blind to such things, and will simply treat your generous gifts as contributions to charity - especially since [NEW] now has a successor!
*hears cheering noobs*
At some point in the near future, I will make myself available in the governor's office to discuss your needs. I shall announce, in advance, when I will be there.
Hopefully, it will not be in the middle of a VvV event - that would be rather counter-productive.
But, rest assured, if I find Minoc's citizens to be unhappy, the king will find me very hard to ignore!
Indeed, I hear we have a potential candidate to replace king Blackthorn, should he prove as unworthy as his predecessor.
*hangs portrait of King Kelmo on the wall. Sadly, upside-down.*
For now, I have been studying our towns and their various resources, and have noticed a huge amount of duplication in the market.
*hears snoring from audience, carries on regardless*
Minoc, I believe, is a unique jewel in Sosaria's crown.
I do not wish our offerings to simply copy those of other towns.
So, regarding our town's trade deal, I will not offer anything that is available elsewhere.
At present, you can obtain SDI in two towns, FC in four towns, and SSI in one town.
That leaves the following:
+1% resist bump
+3 dexterity bonus - this is our current offering.
5% bandage healing bonus
+2 hit point regeneration
+2 mana regeneration
+3 strength bonus
+3 intelligence bonus
+5 HCI
I am open to debate and discussion on any of those. We may even introduce a rotating system, if there is sufficient demand.
Should a particular trade deal become unavailable elsewhere, it can then become available in Minoc, if there is sufficient demand.
I am also aware that our current offering of a +3 dexterity bonus greatly benefits one guild in particular, and I am reluctant to do anything which might cost Siege another piece of its unique culture. We are already much poorer for the loss of the orcs. So, this will take careful consideration.
So, Minoc, let us mark this glad day, when truth, courage and justice prevail!
Let us stride forwards, pickaxe and shovel at the ready, to dig new furrows into the future!
*steps down from podium, goes for a quiet lie down*
I hope that was a bit easier on the eyes! To those of you who went into a trance for a second time, have ye tried the free ale?