Funniest Thing You've Seen In Ultima Online?

[Prince Caspian]

For me, two things come to mind....

#1 - Britain, Catskills Shard. Two guys were in one of those small rooms north of the Butcher shop, apparently stealing from each other to raise the skill. As I walked in, one of them said "Dude dont call the guards" at which point a guard appeared and whacked both of them.

#2 - Outside of Minoc, Napa Valley Shard. We had the Killing Is Natural PK Guild holed up in their tower, and we were Meteor Swarming inside... we couldn't see what we going on but we heard them dying.... then ressing. Suddenly the door opened, and all 12 of the PKs charged into battle... all wearing dresses, bonnets and waving shepards crooks!

 

[kleos]

crazyjoe episodes

 

[Basara]

how's this?

 

[startle]

how's this?

LMAO.........

 

[Slickjack]

Draconi [Lunchbreak]

Nuff said....

 

[Flutter]

I'm having trouble picking one that you all would believe.

 

[Buns Of Glory [ATL]]

http://i42.***********/ay3xnr.jpg

Hands down one of the funniest things I've witnessed in my UO career!

 

[Basara]

how's this?

LMAO.........

What's even funnier is that it's a female character, and a (supposedly) female NPC saying that she's getting wood....

 

[Cogniac]

NPCs used to (they may still!) say the title of any book you gave to them. So you could get them to say some pretty obscene stuff.

A few examples that wouldn't be a bannable offense here on the boards:

• "Thou art giving me a funny feeling in my pants? I do not want this!"
• "Thou art giving me a flaming bag of poop? I do not want this!"
• "Thou art giving me a minute to strip naked? I do not want this!

 

[AirmidCecht]

Total impromptu funeral during the Brit invasion when a New player started out at the Brit Inn. Screen shot happened to catch an all too common comment

 

[Uvtha]

My all time favorite UO moment was back in the old olden days, in the heyday of the disarm thief, when a guy attacked me I disarmed him with wrestling, stole his weapon, chased him into a vendor house where he proceed to run into a corner where he was flanked by 2 vendors, so I rushed into the open diagonal tile, and started wrestling him, and all the while stealing all of the items out of his pack.

So as I punched him his stamina never went up, so he couldn't move, and since my wrestling was gm and his was 0, slowly but surly I was beating him to death from full health.

It took like 5 minutes, and the conversation during that time was hilarious, but eventually he succumbed and was wrestled to death. I think I commented over his pleas for mercy "I don't think anyone has ever been wrestled to death from full health in a real live pvp situation before...".

Needless to say, he didn't find it as amusing as I did.

 

[Lynk]

On catskills some blue was trying to get me guard whacked when I was on a red at the moongate. I noticed he had that saying on a macro that activated black rock.

So I kept following him around and when he started typing I started dropping the black rock at his feet. He ended up blowing himself up.

 

[AirmidCecht]

On catskills some blue was trying to get me guard whacked when I was on a red at the moongate. I noticed he had that saying on a macro that activated black rock.

So I kept following him around and when he started typing I started dropping the black rock at his feet. He ended up blowing himself up.

SO SO Funny

 

[Meat Elemental]

Watching Sir Helper in New Haven getting guard whacked everytime he would respawn, another was some new guy trying to talk to some redspawn camp by my house pleading with them to stop killing him.

 

[Taylor]

 

[Taylor]

 

[Petra Fyde]

I got a giggle out of taking a charmed ogre lord to Yew Gate, fel - only I stopped in Skara and edited his name a bit first, demoted him.

Almost as good was taking a charmed savage rider to the same spot and watching someone try to have a conversation with him.

 

[WootSauce]

Although a bit mean, this made me LOL for days...

http://vboards.stratics.com/uo-pvp-thief/176354-poor-poor-trammy.html

"I will fight like a true warrior."

 

[yars]

there was a bug where tamed animals would still attack you after you tamed them, had to be non guilded for no dmg. this guy just cracked me up running around brit bank with a drag attacking him yelling "RAWR" "I AM A GOD".

 

[Chad Sexington]

Although a bit mean, this made me LOL for days...

http://vboards.stratics.com/uo-pvp-thief/176354-poor-poor-trammy.html

"I will fight like a true warrior."

I was looking for that one.

 

[SinDee]

Oooooo EM Adris...you dog.

 

[CovenantX]

The following isn't from UO, but a forum (wont mention a specific forum name) for UO.

Sorry. The administrator has banned your IP address because No Reason. To contact the administrator click here

No Reason... sounds rough =p

 

[Theo_GL]

So back in the day when you made a city map in Luna it would be grey and say 'Undecipherable map' or something like that. It looked like it might be a rare but it was craftable with a scroll.

I was working carto skill and making tons of maps. I started stacking them around me and was spamming (before general chat - spamming in place) that I was selling these rare maps. I was acting like I didn't know they could just pick them up off the ground like a newby.

When someone would take them from my stacks I would curse them for stealing from me.

Every once in awhile someone would come up and take like all 100 thinking they got the best of me and run off. It cracked me up to no end.

People took hundreds of those things.... OO Ooo rare!

It never occurred to them I was able to generate hundreds.....lol

 

[Taylor]

So back in the day when you made a city map in Luna it would be grey and say 'Undecipherable map' or something like that. It looked like it might be a rare but it was craftable with a scroll.

I was working carto skill and making tons of maps. I started stacking them around me and was spamming (before general chat - spamming in place) that I was selling these rare maps. I was acting like I didn't know they could just pick them up off the ground like a newby.

When someone would take them from my stacks I would curse them for stealing from me.

Every once in awhile someone would come up and take like all 100 thinking they got the best of me and run off. It cracked me up to no end.

People took hundreds of those things.... OO Ooo rare!

It never occurred to them I was able to generate hundreds.....lol

lmao

 

[goldenpower]

 

[goldenpower]

 

[goldenpower]

 

[Nok]

Just missed the moongate coordinates... by that much.

 

[Slickjack]

Hence it being called "The Golem Plains"....

 

[Bazer]

The Day Ethereal Horses Revolted

 

[puni666]

On Great Lakes, I remember fighting the original Peon and Furby (FS!)and they both synced on me with 5/6 casting and max SDI (uncapped at the time). Apparently taking that much damage all at once makes you explode like the Harrower explodes corpses when people die around it. So there were my human remains scattered all around the Jhelom farms.

 

[startle]

LMAO.... love it!

 

[Esherick]

NPCs named Reebdoog. 'Goodbeer' spelled backwards!

 

[Warpig Inc]

NPCs used to (they may still!) say the title of any book you gave to them. So you could get them to say some pretty obscene stuff.

A few examples that wouldn't be a bannable offense here on the boards:

• "Thou art giving me a funny feeling in my pants? I do not want this!"
• "Thou art giving me a flaming bag of poop? I do not want this!"
• "Thou art giving me a minute to strip naked? I do not want this!

Still do. Give them one those gold sales site books dropped around Luna. Funny the NPC pixel knows more then EA.

 

[mana hit]

when someone calls someone else a f'n trammie-WHILE THEY ARE IN TRAMMEL THEMSELVES! or at Luna bank,,,,,,,,,laugh every time.

 

[Vlaude]

I remember my first time visiting the Chesapeake shard (over a decade ago). It was back in the days before Trammel when everyone hung out at WBB Fel. It was just after they released all the fancy colored ores and valorite was worth tons. It was also before insurance and bless deeds. While I was at the bank visiting with the community I would occasionally see people trying to get away with attacking each other in town and getting guard whacked then crowds gathering around their corpses to loot them. Well eventually some idiot in full valorite plate decided he would try to attack someone in town and got guard whacked and of course everyone tried to get a piece of his armor, which resulted in even more attacking, guard whacks, and looting. Chesapeake has always had (and still has) some really unique people on it.

Another memory was on Atlantic. I was visiting a friend and we were talking outside of the moonglow mage shop and someone came running out wearing only a red cape and yelled "Superman!"

 

[LadyNico]

Remember when reapers could teleport onto you in your house?

 

[Raptor85]

Not the most funny but the most recent I have that i screenshotted, all the NPC's in termur were calling guards on each other as they all targeted me. (it still happens whenver i go there)

Dont have a screenshot of it but it made me laugh, I disarm stole someone's weapon down in despise while they were doing a spawn (they were doing whirlwind to clear the spawn around them, so they were letting it build up first) and they got trapped with no weapon and slowly killed by slimes.

Oh...also I vividly remember my first trip into Ice...saw someone there and went to say hello...turned out it was a white wyrm polymorphed to human form. I miss them doing that.

 

[Tina Small]

A couple of funnies from the SA beta.

Receiving one of the new gargoyle pets from another player....

Taming an invisible fire beetle.

 

[Mapper]

Funny thing I remember was in Ice Dungeon, Fighting mobs when I get this odd message bottom left of my screen. No player nearby said it, But I couldn't stop laughing.

 

[QueenZen]

Well for myself the funniest thing or time in UO is when rl and game life intersected for me, way back in the day.

My grown adult male son, in the US military, nuke submariner, was the one whom got me Ultima ONline and my first computer. He became my UO mentor teacher.

So there we were, exiting town, and he TOLD me, mom do not interfere I am going to show ya what to do how to react etc. when attacked by pk/s.

Thus we deliberately leave the so called safety and confines of downtown,
to go to an area where oft reds await victims to kill. He was on his miner smith with fight skills and I was on newbie Queen Zen.

Suddenly someone attacked MY SON !!
I went into insta protective rl mother mode.
I to this day can not even believe my own reaction,
but some game person all colorfully red was attackin .... MY LIL BOY !~!

Natch I was exterminated swiftly, for attacking this red chap.

And my son shouts, at me in game ...
Mom I told ya to OBSERVE !
Now UR fricken dead, what I tell ya, follow orders, watch and observe,
MY skills.

Suddenly this vile evil murderer is laughing his arse off saying...

OMFG that is UR MOM ??
Murderer res'es me and says:

Remind me not to tick ya off, when you DO learn, how to fight !

I said:

I am sorry son, but my momma instinct kicked in :gun:,
forgot your not only a grown man capable to defend yourself rl,
but, IN GAME too ! lol

Ya woulda had to have been there, but there the 2 of them were,
comic to see em side by side,TOGETHER, laughing
reminding me 'Its just a game',
the pk and my son, one red, one blue,
both UO vets back then in 98 laughin *at me* sayin...

UR mom don't follow orders, too well, do she ?

yeh she is feisty, she DONT LISTEN...

Then they both pretended, to 'TAME' me !
Funny as heck !

Then my own son shouting militarily [chain of command mom],
and he killed/pkd me, for not 'following ORDERS' !

 

[Vlaude]

I remember asking for a gate on Atlantic once in Vesper. I was asking to go to Brit but the guy opened the gate to an unknown flat area with monsters I had never seen before. A friend entered the gate with me and we found ourselves stuck in an unfamiliar territory. It turned out we had been gated to Green Acres by the guy. Eventually a GM spotted us there and we explained how we had arrived and he helped us get to Brit. We still laugh about this from time to time.

 

[Kylie Kinslayer]

I remember asking for a gate on Atlantic once in Vesper.

lol

Yeah, asking for gates on Atlantic was a bad thing on occasion. Two weeks into playing I asked for a gate from Old Haven to WBB. After going through the gate I found myself stuck in the "bush trap" in Old Haven. Watching those bank sitting vets laughing at it was funny enough. But standing there for 20 minutes trying to figure out how to get out of it was my own dumbass fault for not remembering I could recall out

 

[Storm]

While not the funniest thing I have seen. I do see this once in a while and it always makes me smile! saw this today on LS in Britain

http://youtu.be/rx1vYvE6xso

 

[Magdalene]

When after about a week of antics, a "Miss Daisy" or "Miss Dixie" in a pink dress finally confessed to my guildmates "she" was a guy... I could almost hear the thuds of their collective jaws dropping.
The "girl" was centre of all attentions for some time, got a house from them, lots of stuff, gold, weapons and whatever...

 

[Endrik]

I was lucky enough to find a statue deed at an IDOC. Imagine my surprise when I restored it at home and saw this...

 

[Taylor]

lmao!

 

[Kylie Kinslayer]

Dang if I wouldn't raise my arms in victory if I was hung like that too

 

[Hunters' Moon]

The funniest thing lately is that raiders will call the guards on a mongbat or an ogre that strays too close to the GZ.

 

[Potgut]

I remember right after Sygian Abyss was released there was a bug that caused vet reward character statues to come alive and walk around. There was a thread made about this (http://vboards.stratics.com/uhall/1...nts-[bugs]-important-up_date-please-read.html) that included these screenshots: