R
Rider1000
Guest
What happened to all the nice guys?
The answer is simple: you did.
See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went to get keys to Lady M, stop by your house to check out your deco when you were lonely but didn't feel like hunting, or even sit there and *hugs* while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were dating in-game treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girl guildmates about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he only owned a 16x16, or didn't pvp good enough, or was too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself in armor that looked cool, or basically be or do any of the things that your castle-owning, good-looking, pvp-god, rich, rare-collecting boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the pvp-god-rich boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you weren't dating him. More time passed, and the pvp-god boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the luna/trammel guild scene for several months having only encountered greedy, wacked out players and ****** bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"
Well, once again, you did.
You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical-cyber intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend.
Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who buy you hair dye; or lock down potted plants at your house just because; or buy you a UO Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or *hugs* when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the rich pvp elite boyfriend that you had. He probably joined factions, made an awesome suit, bought 100m, and generally acted like more of an ##@***@ than he ever wanted to be.
Fact is, now, he's probably getting cybered every day, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:
1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in UO men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.
If you were five years younger.
So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've ----ed yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bull---- and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't ---ing want you, now.
Sincerely,
A Recovering Ultima Online Nice Guy
The answer is simple: you did.
See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went to get keys to Lady M, stop by your house to check out your deco when you were lonely but didn't feel like hunting, or even sit there and *hugs* while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were dating in-game treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girl guildmates about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he only owned a 16x16, or didn't pvp good enough, or was too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself in armor that looked cool, or basically be or do any of the things that your castle-owning, good-looking, pvp-god, rich, rare-collecting boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the pvp-god-rich boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you weren't dating him. More time passed, and the pvp-god boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the luna/trammel guild scene for several months having only encountered greedy, wacked out players and ****** bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"
Well, once again, you did.
You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical-cyber intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend.
Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who buy you hair dye; or lock down potted plants at your house just because; or buy you a UO Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or *hugs* when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the rich pvp elite boyfriend that you had. He probably joined factions, made an awesome suit, bought 100m, and generally acted like more of an ##@***@ than he ever wanted to be.
Fact is, now, he's probably getting cybered every day, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:
1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in UO men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.
If you were five years younger.
So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've ----ed yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bull---- and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't ---ing want you, now.
Sincerely,
A Recovering Ultima Online Nice Guy
