The citizens of Barter Town rejoice upon news of Chad's release! He had been imprisoned for some time. For those who do not know, the great Chad Sexington was kidnapped and the monument upon which he rested was destroyed many months ago. The citizens have been pleading for his return for what seems like forever. His recent return could have been a great step in restoring peace to Sosaria.
However....
Look at him! Anyone who has ever even seen a statue of Chad knows that Chad is undeniably sexy and I would not use that term to describe this man. So I appeared from the shadows and approached him cautiously.
"Hail!" I said, as he gave me a sidelong glance. "'Tis I, Stinky Pete, honorable servant and proud citizen of Barter Town. And who might ye be?"
"I am Chad Sexington, Lord of Barter Town. Do you not know your own guildmaster when you see him?" He spoke arrogantly.
"We have never met," I replied. "But I have been made aware of your recent release. Did they treat you well, my lord?"
"Nay, it has been many moons since I have seen the light of day. My release could not have come soon enough," he mumbled.
"Come now my brother, and allow me to escort thee to Buccaneer's Bath for a hot bath, an ale, and a fresh change of clothes," I offered.
"We do not have time for such things!" He exclaimed. "We must gather all of the citizens of Barter Town so that we may confer as to how we will achieve the return of the log upon which I rested for all these years."
"A log, my Lord?" I questioned. "Ye want me to rally the citizens so that we may discuss logs being placed in the forest?"
"Yes, and make haste!" He shouted.
I dip into the shadows as I made my way towards Barter Town. As I do, I am swept up with dread by the conversation that had just unfolded. My original suspicions had been confirmed. I have never met Chad, but even I know that the real Chad would never put business, business of a missing log nonetheless, above professional style and ice cold ale! The refusal of a fresh change of clothes was evidence enough for me, but I would need something more if I was going to prove to the good citizens that this man was an imposter.
I remain cloaked in shadow as I crept up behind the villainous imposter. It was too easy, the real Chad would have detected me long before I was within arm's length of his pack. I skillfully open the lid to see various items and a piece of parchment that stuck out like a sore thumb from the everyday personal effects of a lone traveler. The Chad impersonator moved his hand to pick his nose as I effortlessly remove the parchment from his pack.
"huh?!" He cried as he turned to see the posterior of a llama darting into the woods and began digging through his pack furiously. The look on his face was molded into an exquisite sculpture of terror and rage.
I quickly run to the Barter Town Hall with the parchment in hand. I glance at it as the citizens begin pouring in from their shops and homes to check on the commotion. As the citizens mumble and whisper among themselves, I glean that this parchment is but a royal pardon absolving a man named Leonard for the crime begging within the walls of the King's castle, a crime that the real Chad would never even consider. I had my proof! I presented it to the good people of Barter Town. I informed them that this man was sent here by the King as a spy, sent to gather our secrets and plans for the future of our once great town.
So if ye find thyself in Barter town, feel free to stop by and fling produce at Leonard the beggar, royal imposter, and not-so-snappy dresser. But be careful as Leonard can be quite feisty if ye stand too close.
However....
Look at him! Anyone who has ever even seen a statue of Chad knows that Chad is undeniably sexy and I would not use that term to describe this man. So I appeared from the shadows and approached him cautiously.
"Hail!" I said, as he gave me a sidelong glance. "'Tis I, Stinky Pete, honorable servant and proud citizen of Barter Town. And who might ye be?"
"I am Chad Sexington, Lord of Barter Town. Do you not know your own guildmaster when you see him?" He spoke arrogantly.
"We have never met," I replied. "But I have been made aware of your recent release. Did they treat you well, my lord?"
"Nay, it has been many moons since I have seen the light of day. My release could not have come soon enough," he mumbled.
"Come now my brother, and allow me to escort thee to Buccaneer's Bath for a hot bath, an ale, and a fresh change of clothes," I offered.
"We do not have time for such things!" He exclaimed. "We must gather all of the citizens of Barter Town so that we may confer as to how we will achieve the return of the log upon which I rested for all these years."
"A log, my Lord?" I questioned. "Ye want me to rally the citizens so that we may discuss logs being placed in the forest?"
"Yes, and make haste!" He shouted.
I dip into the shadows as I made my way towards Barter Town. As I do, I am swept up with dread by the conversation that had just unfolded. My original suspicions had been confirmed. I have never met Chad, but even I know that the real Chad would never put business, business of a missing log nonetheless, above professional style and ice cold ale! The refusal of a fresh change of clothes was evidence enough for me, but I would need something more if I was going to prove to the good citizens that this man was an imposter.
I remain cloaked in shadow as I crept up behind the villainous imposter. It was too easy, the real Chad would have detected me long before I was within arm's length of his pack. I skillfully open the lid to see various items and a piece of parchment that stuck out like a sore thumb from the everyday personal effects of a lone traveler. The Chad impersonator moved his hand to pick his nose as I effortlessly remove the parchment from his pack.
"huh?!" He cried as he turned to see the posterior of a llama darting into the woods and began digging through his pack furiously. The look on his face was molded into an exquisite sculpture of terror and rage.
I quickly run to the Barter Town Hall with the parchment in hand. I glance at it as the citizens begin pouring in from their shops and homes to check on the commotion. As the citizens mumble and whisper among themselves, I glean that this parchment is but a royal pardon absolving a man named Leonard for the crime begging within the walls of the King's castle, a crime that the real Chad would never even consider. I had my proof! I presented it to the good people of Barter Town. I informed them that this man was sent here by the King as a spy, sent to gather our secrets and plans for the future of our once great town.
So if ye find thyself in Barter town, feel free to stop by and fling produce at Leonard the beggar, royal imposter, and not-so-snappy dresser. But be careful as Leonard can be quite feisty if ye stand too close.