My attempt to spruce up the current event Fiction.

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[Mark_Mythic]

An interesting interpretation. I can tell you read it and I thank you. I'm sorry you found it "slapped together".

I chose to keep a single perspective since the last time the queens met I told the story from Dawns point of view. I find it interesting to explore how people perceive each other vs. how they see themselves. I am also interested in the 'unknowableness' of others.

As a stylistic choice, I prefer to let people read between the lines than spell things out. I'm interested in the use of inferrance and implication, going back to my interest in the unknowableness of others. I am happy to see that you read between the lines quite easily and your story reflects that. It also suggests that my efforts at inferrence were successful and I didn't really need to spell it out for you to get the point.

Thanks for taking the time to give feedback, I do appreciate it. I don't claim to be some kind of authority on writing in general, I just write stuff the way I like to read it.

Your tag says you are in Iraq, be well and stay safe.

 

[Mark_Mythic]

Mark I thought for fiction for the Bane Chosen was solid. Well thought out, well written and well executed. I think it is a good direction to continue to take UO fiction.

Renyard, I think adding your own perspective on the interaction was also creative and interesting. When writing parallel fiction to Ultima Online Cannon, I find it better to filter those thoughts through characters of our own creation rather then cannon characters (EA run characters) even if we feel those characters are acting out of character from what we perceive them to be or believe.

That being said since there are perhaps infinite worlds, I propose you post alternate UO fiction with a sub heading as occurring on an alt shard which opens up infinite possibilities to re-write what and how things happen while keeping the integrity of what is happening on the shards we live on.

Just like we have bad days in RL, act differently then we expect, speak in ways we might not normally, or apply more then our standard amount of mascara, it is important to give fictional characters the benefit of the doubt as these character nuances help create a more believable reality. Though writing a character inconsistently will also damage that reality so you want to err on the side of consistency if you can.

Lore's Player

Oy, I've gotten a lot of grief off that mascara! You should have seen my first draft, I wrote her as straight up Cruella Deville but Cal put the kabosh on that. Anyway, I think it's fine if Minax wants to wear Mascara. I think she's kind of sexy for a cugar. Heh.

Renyard, I was not offended. I've been criticized on this forum much more strongly than that. Heck, I've had a person calling for my job. Anyway, God's speed on your trip home and I appreciate you guys over there. You all make America the kind of place where people can play UO without worrying about a car bomb going off and I thank you.