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BREAKING NEWS--ATTEMPTED ASSAULT ON COVE
On Friday, July 11th the outpost of Cove was brutally attacked in an unprovoked andillegal assault that included citizens and governors of several Britannian cities. Fortunately, the attack was rebuffed by the brave efforts of Governor Holly Bloodhand of Vesper.
Led by Lady Ivy, one-time governor of Vesper, a ragtag band of ruffians from all overSosaria stormed into the newly built Vesper Navy Recruitment Station located just south of the main Cove gate. Therein they interrupted Governor Bloodhand's amicable meeting with the Cove mayor and demanded information about Lady Ivy's missing daughter Willow.
They claimed they had evidence that had led them to Governor Bloodhand, but she denied any knowledge of the matter.
Bloodhand asserted that she was there on a legitimate mission to recruit naval personnel for the city of Vesper. The mayor of Cove personally confirmed that Bloodhand was visiting at his request to discuss regional security issues and coooperative employment opportunities between the outpost and her city.
The mob grew increasingly hostile, and Lady Ivy declared that the unruly gang would reboard her ship and continue to Cove, at which point Governor Bloodhand, infuriated by the clear overreach of the band of ruffians against her neighbor and ally, promptly boarded her own majestic vessel and moved to cut off the bandits.
Bloodhand made a most impressive stand at the orc fort dock, calling forth mighty allies from the sea and the ether. Osiredon the Scalis Enforcer vigorously defended the dock while Bloodhand and her crew rained cannon fire upon the invaders while they were distracted. After a great many of the group fell under the onslaught they finally took down the Scalis Enforcer... only to be met by Governor Bloodhand's freshly summoned harbinger! They made quicker work of this, but were forced to withdraw regardless.
Lady Ivy's ship had taken severe damage during the altercation, and the mob had to limp back to the Vesper Naval
Recruitment Station to disembark. At this point they raided the locked boxes in the building and stole personal belongings of Governor Bloodhand's and various Vesper Navy personnel.
Cove law enforcement officials are investigating the incident and expect to file formal charges against the vandalous would-be invaders. The mayor of Cove has issued the following statement:
"We were very lucky that Governor Bloodhand of Vesper was on hand to keep Cove safe from these thugs! After the events on Friday and the spirited and ingenious defense of our outpost by our neighboring city's governor, Cove has accepted the protectorship of the Vesper Navy under Governor Holly Bloodhand."
Lady Ivy and her associates could not be reached for comment before publication.
VESPER GUARD STATIONED IN COVE
As per the agreement between Cove and Vesper necessitated by recent events, a representative of Vesper has been stationed in Cove. Please offer Razer your warmest greetings and cooperation.
MYSTERIOUS FUNGUS PLAGUES COVE GUARD HOUSE, HEALER SUSPECTS FLY-BY-NIGHT MUSHROOM FARMER
Cove guards report a strange mushroom sprouting in the northernmost guard house. They claim that despite repeated attempts to eradicate the fungus, it keeps returning.
"I'm certain I've wiped it out on multiple occasions," stated Constanza, the healer often tasked with removal of the stubborn substance. "I think someone is coming in at night and re-seeding the stuff. I swear sometimes it looks like someone's been farming it in there!"
Constanza stated that the guard house's out of the way location and the fact that it is usually unstaffed make it ideal for such an endeavor. She stated that she suspected the local farmer but had no proof.
Farmer Kala, however, denied involvement.
"I've got enough farming to do already! Sure would be nice if some of these layabouts helped feed themselves once in a while."
LOCAL WITCH BEMOANS LACK OF BUSINESS, COUSIN'S GROOMING
Cove's most famous sorceress, the lovely and beguiling Vela, recently caught up with the Cove Herald. She expressed concern for the lack of business she does these days and for her cousin Kala's unusual grooming regimen.
"Hardly anyone seems to be hunting in the Void Pool anymore!" she stated. "I have all these great crafting tools, but I guess the crafters just don't do well there."
She had this to say regarding her cousin Kala, the farmer who tends the small fields and orchard in the city walls:
"She's so weird," Vela said, looking troubled and chewing her lower lip anxiously. "I don't understand why she won't just shave already."
When asked, Kala responded:
"My beard is very well cared-for, thank you very much!"
LOCAL ORCS SHARE PIZZAS WITH COVE RESIDENTS
In a strange development in the uneasy relationship between Cove and the nearby orc fort, a small band of orcs approached the main Cove gate on Tuesday morning and deposited several crates of slighty stale, partially eaten pizzas.
Attempts to question the orcs on the mysterious gesture were met with confusing gibberish and physical aggression.
NO PROGRESS MADE IN EFFORT TO ATTRACT TAVERNKEEPER
Despite popular demand, Cove is still considered too small to attract the interest of tavernkeepers looking to expand their businesses. Harbormaster Sherwood lamented that his liquor all had to be imported specially.
"A good tavern would do well here," he insisted. "I'll keep trying to get a proper bar out here until the day I die! Or until the day one is built, I suppose."
Although Cove remains tavernless, Cove residents nonetheless seem to enjoy plenty of access to a wide variety of liquors and ales. The exact source of these beverages is unclear.
